Love is not selfish

Romans 12:10  Be devoted to one another in brotherly love, give preference to one another in honor.

     This world that we live in is very self centered.  We base our standards of living in this country on our looks, how we feel, our jobs, how much money we have and even our own personal desires in what we want to have in life.  This country base there life on achieving the highest level of how to please our flesh and what can we do for me and make me happy. When we become married if we think this way, we bring this kind of thinking into our marriages and our families, which can create problems in our relationship with each other and also how we raise our children.

     Selfishness is the opposite of Love. This selfishness is ingrained into each and everyone of us when we were born. When children misbehave they are acting out of selfishness. Husbands and wives also act out in their marriage by mistreating each other. If you think about it, almost every sinful act that has happen in the bible or today in this world or the generations to come, have been brought about by a selfish motive. 

     By putting  no standards on our self and high standard on our husband or wife or relationships, we are actually being selfish..

     When a husband or wife puts his things that he wants to do in life before their spouses, that is a sure sign of being selfish. When a husband or wife have  a habit of complaining about putting their  time and energy into the needs of their spouses, they are being selfish. You really have to meet each other half way, and give to each, and put your needs above the other.

 1 Corinthians 13:5 But Love does not seek its own.

     When you talk about true love in a marriage you look for ways to say Yes in a marriage. You look for ways of pleasing your spouse. I heard a saying about work, work as you work on to the Lord. Well I say Love as you Love unto the Lord with your marriage, with your children, with the relationships you have in your life.

     The funny thing about acts of love though, you can even be selfish with your acts of love, if you want love back, or you need to have bragging rights that you were loving, its really is a matter of the heart.  What is your motive.  True love is based out of a heart of sincere love and the only way you can really develop this is the more time you spend with God your father, the more you become like him. Your either coming out of a pure love for others through the heart of God or your coming out of love through a heart of selfishness.

     It can be  really hard to come out of love for your spouse or  relationships  around you in your life, because  it will cause you to say no to your desires and yes to what they need. Your putting the happiness of others before your needs. I've notice in my own life when I put others before me, out of a right motive not expecting nothing in return, what it does is people love and appreciate you more. The seeds I have planted in other people lives of love have been over and above in my life. It creates a atmosphere of love and appreciation around me when I love others, people can feel that you are really loving  them and they want to be loved. Everyone whats to be loved.

      Who does not want to have love in there life? It  creates a peace and a joy inside of you. When you start to love your mate and your children and the relationships around you, what actually happens is you create  atmosphere  of greater purpose. You are establishing the will of God right here in this earth, paradise as it was to be intended.

     Your spouse is the one person in your life that knows you the best. When you start displaying this change in your life, that you didn't act before. When the relationships in your life start noticing a change
those relationships also change for the better. When you change, people also change around you.

     People in your life are watching you, weather you know this or not. You have a reputation. At one time in my life, I was a very selfish unloving person. If you ask those that are closest to me. I have changed a great deal by developing my relationship with my God (Father). As I drew close to him, I developed a love for my husband and a deeper love for my daughter. I wanted love in my life, so I started to give it as my Father filled me more and more. I became more fulfilled when I started to demonstrate real love to them, and in turn they saw the change in me, and love me even more.

Philippians 2:3 Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves.